Al meets a guy named Spike, who has a ""secret club"". Spike tells Al he might be able to be a member, and asks to come to his house to make sure he is cool enough. Spike tricks Al into doing a lot of stupid things, such as tearing off a pants leg, and dipping his arms in hot melted chocolate. Later on, a guy named Seymour comes over, who is in the club. Seymour sees how stupid Al looks, and doesn't get into the club. Spike tricked Al into acting like a jerk in front of everybody.
All of Al's friends are talking about how great John Tesh is, and how they have seen him before. So, Al begins to lie and tells everyone that he knows John Tesh personally. His friends believe him, and ask Al to invite him over. Al tries to book him over, but that costs $82,000. So, Al does an informercial, selling all kinds of junk. Through the informercial, he gets $82,000. Later on, Al starts getting mail from his customers saying how his products don't even work, and they want their money back. So, Al is right back where he started.
Al is trying to make a song about cheese when some miners crash through a wall in his living room. Al believes that the miners are very rude, and they begin to fight and shout at each other. The Hooded Avenger tells Al to quit fighting, and they do quit by watching some TV. They fixed the wall, when a bolder came crashing down through the wall. Al made some split-pea fudge to keep the underground rats away, therefore, making the wall ""fixed"". Because of this, the miners decide to help Al with his cheese song.
This episode starts when Bobby comes in to ask Al a question. Bobby begins asking questions that Al doesn't know the answers to. The Hooded Avenger comes in, and knows the answers to all of Bobby's questions. Al wants to be like the Hooded Avenger and know everything, so he orders books from ""The Know-It-All Correspondance School"". Al thinks he can get everything done in one day, but he can't. The Hooded Avenger and Bobby come back, and offer Al some pizza. Harvey eats some of the pizza, and begins choking. Al knows exactly what to do because he's been reading a book on how to take care of hamsters over and over. Now, Al finally realizes that learning new things takes time, study, and hard work.
Al forgot to get Harvey a present for his birthday, so he travels back in time to get one. But Harvey only wants Al to sing for his birthday. As a present, Al sings Yoda.
Harvey gets too close to the microwave, and turns into a giant mutant hamster. Harvey breaks the world record for largest rodent. Al is jealous and tries to break some world records himself. He can't. No matter how hard he tries. Later, Hanson comes over to see Harvey. They begin taking pictures. The flash from the cameras shrink Harvey's radioactive DNA, and he becomes smaller again.
J.B. Toppersmith's nephew Huey comes for a visit. J.B. tells Al if Huey is unhappy, he will get fired. When Huey arrives, Al tries to make him as happy as possible, by singing when he is commanded to. Al is sick of this, and starts trying to find other ways to deal with Huey. Huey becomes unhappy and fires Al, but Al decides to quit. As Al is walking away, Huey tries to get Al to stay and says that nobody likes him. Al watches TV with Huey, and he becomes nicer.
Al is having a big talent show. The one who wins will get a hand-crafted sculpture of Marvin the Sea Bass. The problem is, it melted. Meanwhile, Corky thinks she is not talented. She wants to quit the talent show. She later finds out that she can bend and break anying heavy with her bare hands. The winner was Bobby, but Al can't get the ice sculpture because it melted. Al's mom brought one. Corky gets an E for Effort.
Al has a ton of chores to do around the cave, so he asks Cousin Corky to help with some. Corky has to get to an art convention soon. In Al's mailbag, he finds a travel brocure about going to Hawaii. Al goes, without even telling Corky. Now, Corky has to fill in for Al, and miss the art convention.
Al is very upset because Harvey won't perform his death-defying stunt on the show. A pet psycologist comes over, but makes it worse. Soon, it is time for his stunt. Harvey won't jump off the building. (That was the stunt.) Al gets so mad at Harvey that he starts calling him names. Harvey locks himself in his house.The Hooded Avenger comes over and tells Al that he should apologize to Harvey. Al does, and Harvey feels much better, and does the stunt.
Al gets nominated for best TV show host award. He is very happy about this. He turns on his TV to the Uncle Ralphie Show. Uncle Ralphie has also been nominated, and he thinks he will win. Al calls him on the phone and says that there are a bunch of other TV show hosts out there that have a good chance of winning, too. Uncle Ralphie says ""What like that loser, Weird Al?"". Al claims he is not a loser, and there is now a war between Al and Uncle Ralphie. They begin pulling pranks on each other and are not playing fairly. Because of this, the winner was Fred Huggins, the worst TV show host, and the only one who played fair.
Al is having a holiday party for any holiday. The problem is that everyone is in a bad mood because Al won't listen to anything that anyone is saying.
Al has just gotten back from his cave-dwelers' convention when he notices that he has gotten robbed. He starts looking for things to do, but can only find trash. The Hooded Avenger brings in a TV set, so Al can at least can watch TV. Al turns onto the news channel, and sees that the police have found the guy who robbed him. So, Al does get his stuff back.
