In the ""pilot"" part of the episode, the Shaw brothers, former hockey stars, now fat and middle aged, face dilemmas in the town of Poland, New Hampshire. In the ""Falling Acorns"" part, Dottie decides to buy the old movie house.
Rehearsals for the Easter pagent don't go as planned; Hank does not support Dottie as he begins to blackmail Sharon Ropers about her affair with Garret.
Because he keeps giving her compliments, Dottie thinks that a handsome young banker has a crush on her, but she can't convince Julie. Waylon goes into business for himself selling ice cream to kids, but an offended elderly woman shoots him with a paint-ball gun. Monica tells her parents that she wants to have sex with her boyfriend.
The Shaw brothers don't know what to do when their minister reveals that he is gay and asks for their support.
When a teenage girl goes missing after a fight with her boyfriend, the brothers adopt strange methods to help find her, including a crime-sniffing Chihuahua. Meanwhile, talk of the girl's sex life leads the women to wonder about their own children's possible sexual activities.
Waylon asks Hank to help find out whether Julie is cheating on him. Hank punches Haggis and breaks his nose. Their beloved music teacher's death brings the brothers together in song, but Hank thinks the man may have been murdered. Garrett is busy making deals to improve his chances of re-election as mayor. Dottie decides to turn the theater into a nightclub.
Waylon hurts his leg, but he won't explain how he injured himself.
A basketball tournament keeps Poland on its toes.