Celebrity tabloid journalist and Lowdown columnist Alex Burchill (Adam Zwar) scores a highly coveted interview with the environmentalist, Tantra-loving, Buddhist rock God, Wasp Warneke (Anthony Ahern) on one condition... he doesn't ask about Tantra. In an effort to impress his artist girlfriend Rita (Beth Buchanan), Alex offers her the job as photographer. But when his actual photographer and loyal friend, Bob (Paul Denny), finds out he's been sidelined on the Wasp job, his heart is broken. When the time comes to meet Wasp, Alex has to battle car trouble, traffic jams, road rage incidents and some disturbing news from Dr James (Dailan Evans) regarding a shadow on his arse, and ends up having to 'do a phoner' instead of a 'face-to-face'. But suddenly, his luck changes. Wasp opens up about tantra, the traffic starts moving and Alex ends up getting his face-to-face meeting after all - and so much more...
Publicist to the stars Hope van der Boom (Julia Zemiro), briefs Alex before he interviews actor, sex-symbol and family man Oliver Barry (Sullivan Stapleton). The interview is awkward and uncomfortable, despite the fact that Alex and Oliver share a birthday. But soon after, Alex and Bob find themselves providing refuge for Oliver Barry who is on the run from a bunch of paps - one of which he found hiding in his hotel room wardrobe. That night, Rita, keen to make up with Alex after the Wasp Warneke debacle, climbs through his window and into his bed. The only problem is Alex lent his bed to the besieged Oliver. Rita is obliged to take full advantage of the mix-up, much to Alex's despair. Next day the editor (Kim Gyngell) encourages Alex to document family man Oliver's shenanigans in his column. Although excited by this prospect, Alex can't help feeling depressed about Rita. He visits Dr James who diagnoses him as having a broken heart and prescribes a medicinal visit to a strip club, where Alex's circumstances inevitably go from bad to worse.
Temperamental tennis star Mitch "Zirco" Zicopoulos (Alex Tsitsopoulos) has pulled out from a warm-up tournament citing a sore finger, leaving 20,000 fans out of pocket. Alex's editor is convinced Zirco is faking his injury and sends Alex and Bob to find the truth. But gaining access to the code-protected restricted-access floor at the boutique hotel where Zirco is staying proves harder than they thought. The anti-terrorist elevators only allow three incorrect attempts at entering the code before sleeping gas is emitted from its vents. The celebrity acquaintances that Alex encounters in the foyer give him the slip, and Alex and Bob's preposterous efforts to get to Zirco come to naught. Meanwhile, Alex is grappling with the various hair-raising diagnoses that Dr James rings through regarding a pimple on his 'groinal area'. Yep, it seems for now that the whole world has been designed to ruin Alex's day, and when our boys eventually encounter Zirco, their luck plummets further...
When plagiarising popstar Sofia Corelli is assaulted on the eve of her Melbourne tour, Alex suspects that the renowned torch singer Abi Hart (Emily Barclay) has something to do with it. After all, Sofia has totally ripped-off Abi's sound and look. Alex learns that drug-addicted Abi is holed-up at a maximum security rehab centre, but Dr James refuses to write a referral for Alex, despite diagnosing him as an alcoholic, since the rehab centre is strictly for celebrities or people with exotic addictions. Alex and Bob make the perilous journey up the Yarra river to the remote rehab centre, a formidable compound with trigger happy security guards. Cunningly disguised as a doctor and maintenance guy respectively, Alex and Bob are able to infiltrate the centre and get to the unsuspecting Abi. Alex eventually manages to win Abi’s confidence to extract the confession, but when Rita turns up, all hell breaks loose.
It's late Saturday night, and the editor is thrilled to hear via the police scanner that prominent businessman Jack Cooper (Steve Bisley) has been busted drink driving. A reluctant Alex, with Bob and Rita in tow, heads to Cooper's Toorak home for a foot-in-door interview. Cooper isn't there, but the gang is invited inside the old-style mansion by lonely Mrs Cooper, (Caroline O'Connor) a former actress and eisteddfod regular who still dreams of the spotlight. Inside the Cooper residence, Dr Who fan Bob learns that Mrs Cooper once worked with Tom Baker and she's only too happy to show off her Dr Who memorabilia, while Bob shows off his likeness to Tom Baker. Not long after, a drunk and belligerent Mr Cooper finally arrives home and in no mood for company. When Alex brings up the drink-driving and Bob shoves a camera in his face, Cooper sets his dogs on them and a terrifying chase ensues. Bob and Alex manage to propel themselves to safety. But where's Rita?
Australia's number one golfer Mike Lavish (Bert LaBonté) arrives in town to promote his new golf DVD game. Armed with video evidence of Lavish taking an alleged air-swing at the Australian Masters, Alex confronts Lavish at a press conference and is quickly ejected by a "hormonal" Hope Van der Boom. Alex later approaches Lavish in the gents, apologises for his harsh line of questioning - "I was ordered to do it" - then accidentally clubs Lavish in the face while showing him his swing. While Alex rushes to Dr James for medical attention on his hand, Lavish passes out, hits his head on every possible hard surface on the way down and falls into a coma. CCTV footage of the incident is damning and Alex is apprehended by police and charged with grievous bodily harm, with a likely upgrade to murder if Lavish doesn't pull through. Only Lavish knows what really happened, but will he regain consciousness to tell the tale?
Alex is heavied into writing a puff piece on underworld crime boss Tony Marino (Martin Sacks) and drags Bob along to take the pics. Blindfolded, they are taken to meet Tony at a seedy hotel. During the interview, a nervous Alex suffers an anaphylactic reaction from eating the complimentary peanuts. Tony's henchmen dump him at Dr James' surgery, leaving Bob with the Marino gang. Days later, Bob still hasn't returned and Alex fears the worst. The editor pushes Alex to write the story of Bob's demise. Alex is miserable, but is consoled by Bob's replacement, perky photographer Janet. Janet is everything Alex could possibly want and fills the void perfectly, but when Bob turns up bound and gagged on the riverbank, Janet's true nature is revealed.
Project Starsearch finalist Joss Miller (Jane Harber) has absconded from the show's compound, jeopardising the multi-million dollar TV final. The editor offers $10,000 of his own money to the first journalist able to locate Joss and get the story - the Sunday Sun's future depends on it. With a holiday to a luxury resort planned, Alex spurns the offer, telling the editor he doesn't even watch Project Starsearch. At the resort, Bob meets the girl of his dreams, Sam (Kate Jenkinson) and things quickly get hot and heavy, while Alex takes a mud-bath, and ends up rescuing Sam's sister, Lucy, from drowning. Alex and Lucy hit it off, and Alex feels that he has finally met his future wife. Life for our boys is blissfully perfect. But when the boys discover that Lucy is actually Project Starsearch runaway Joss Miller, Alex must decide whether to go with his heart... or with his journalist instincts, and write up a story that could possibly save the Sunday Sun.
Alex has a chance to impress the new editor of the Sunday Sun when some erotic photos of the morally conservative Minister for Families fall into his lap.
Publicist Hope Van Der Boom organises for Alex to do a puff piece on volatile actor Lachlan Reid after audio of Reid berating the sound recordist is leaked online.
When a celebrity chef insults Alex's new girlfriend on national television, Alex and Bob set up an elaborate News of the World type sting to expose the chef cheating on his wife with a wannabe actress.
Alex and Bob have a reconciliation lunch with Ben Hollander, the bad-boy actor they exposed taking drugs and having sex with a call-girl. But Ben has now turned his back on a life of philandering and is getting remarried on the weekend.
