In the first programme Bob looks at the black hole that is afternoon television; unearths the moment when a contestant in Family Fortunes answered with the word "Turkey" to all the questions; and takes a look at life on a London council estate. Along the way he reflects on what has happened to such old friends as the "Watney's Party Seven", "Aztec" chocolate bars, Clyde Best and "Crimplene".
Tonight, the truth behind Bob's part in The Beatles' Sgt. Pepper's album and the emotional support he offered to the wives of the Beirut kidnap victims (but not Sunny Mann). He'll also be talking us through Britain's most diplomatic hard man Pauk Sykes, who has devised an ingenious way of dealing with shark attacks and raffling off an ivory necklace, which is beautiful and belonged to him. A Liverpudlian man unaccountably caught in a car with a woman shows us how to avoid the unwanted attentions of the local police and there are two monster-hunting scientists who share a beard between them. There's also Boy George and his record company boss who likes to dance as he eats, some nearly wild deer causing sexual excitement for a female wildlife programme presenter, 'Catweazle' at the BPI Awards and Nigel Dempster's prowess as a live link man.
Studio-based late-night satire presented by Bob Mills. Blind Dates, An Under-age Drinker, The Hardest Man In Britain, A Callow Youth's Morbid Fear Of Oil Tankers, A Burglar Outraged By Police Attempts To Catch Him. Music comes from The Buzzcocks.
The opening titles of 'A Country Practice' are shown to be about a pair of missing y-fronts, Bob looks at some tough football supporters, has a wee in the street, and uses a phonecard to withdraw cash from an ATM. Also features the fantastic young door-to-door salesmen in 'The Knock'. Live music from Gary Numan who performs "Cars", "Scars", and "Are Friends Electric".
Tonight, a man who likes to discuss shaving on first dates, and another who likes to discuss salt. There's also rare footage of Bob's sister's wedding, including his mum's party piece and a small contretemps at the reception. The repossession of Rod Hull's house is recreated, with 'Emu' playing a starring role, and Ulrika Jonsson meets Bob for a high-powered TV dinner. The "Casualty Location Man" (Bob) is out and about again, stalking an old man who looks like he could easily topple over and be decapitated by a taxi, Lovely. Bob reveals the real reason behind Graham Taylor's extraordinary behaviour during England's World Cup qualifying campaign. He's called Phil Neal - a man with a very annoying habit of repeating everything his boss says. Bob takes to the streets to try it out for himself. There's also Marlon Brando swallowing a bug. Bob's pals Stiff Little Fingers pop along to thrash out three songs: "Alternative Ulster", "Harp", and "At the Edge".
Tonight Chats About A Regional Crimes Show, A Vet Who Eats What He Cures, A TV Gardener Who Prunes Quite Violently And Identical Twin. Live music from Nick Heyward.
Tonight, a full expose on a North London Christian group who earnestly believe the planet is being run by Lucifer. The proof is there for all to see - mainly in the bar codes used on gallon bottles of motor oil. Bob follows their traumatic journey up the A1 in a van with a dodgy wheel. It's alright - God provides them with a replacement. There is a bicycle-riding drugs dealer whose business is interrupted by a drunken old man falling over on him, and KEITH CHEGWIN pops up just when you'd least like him to. Britain's top TV investigators turn their attention to the scourge of car boot sales, where they manage to find a power drill with slightly loose connections. It's a scandal that shocks Bob to his very core but the people at the car boot sale seem to take it in their stride.
Bob Mills continues his quest to seek out the weirdest and wackiest folk on the globe. This week, Bob shows us how difficult it is to launch an acting career when you live in Sheffield. He follows one young hopeful who - armed with a few appearances in Look North - tries to get a sponsored car and clothes. Despite the attentions of an image consultant, he still holds out hope of getting a part as a menacing cop. Bob also finds out how explorer John Blashford-Snell responds to the arrival of a new kid on the block.
Jesco, the best tap dancer in the Appalachian Mountains. He also has a brother called Dorothy, who sniffs petrol, and thinks he's Elvis. In addition, a flashback returns to the early '80s where we meet Johnny Rubbish, Britain's first punk comedian, who teaches Bob a thing or two about punchlines.