Award-winning journalist Peter Ross experiences the pomp and pageantry of the Bo'ness Fair, said to be the largest children's fair in Europe. Each year since 1897, a local schoolgirl has been crowned Fair Queen in a ceremony which arguably means more to the town than a real coronation would to the nation. The graft and craft that goes into celebrating the occasion has to be seen to believed. It is a psychedelic trip, featuring hand-built plywood castles bigger than houses, custom-made dresses that would be the envy of any young royal, and a grand procession with bands and floats which is a sort of Scottish mardi gras.