The Drugs Don't Work

The launch of Uncle Andy's work of literary genius at 3 Orange Terrace is not proving to be much of a crowd-puller. He certainly won't be shifting many copies in Germany, where the translation is Mein Kampf. Mind you, he had already halved his potential readership as the book went to press - "published in Ulster, by the Ulster Protestant Press, for Protestants. Not for sale to taigs." Neither is Billy to impressed with his dedication: "To a turncoat cop who stood idly by while the Protestant people were trampled on. How do you live with yourself?" But what goes around comes around and, as sales figures peak at 3, Andy finds himself £1000 in debt to Mad Lenny. As the unwitting guarantour of this "loan", Mervyn finds himself lured into Uncle Andy's solution to the problem - Medical Drugs Trials. The only catch? They've got to stay off the drink for the duration...