(Willabald Feivel) Cornfed finds out from his father via a documentary co-written with Ken Burns, that he has a genetic disease that gives him a choice, either lose his virginity, or die in 24 hours. Duckman tries to help him out, but Bernice saves the day and Cornfed pledges his undying love. He becomes dejected when she rejects him and tries to commit suicide.
| Name | Type | Role | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Spencer Green | Writer | ||
| Danny Mann | Guest Star | ||
| Blair Underwood | Guest Star | ||
| Chuck McCann | Guest Star | ||
| Edward Winter | Guest Star | ||
| Lee Meriwether | Guest Star | ||
| Thomas Gibson | Guest Star | ||
| Bob Guccione | Guest Star | ||
| Peter Strauss | Guest Star | ||
| Jeff McGrath | Director |